A little over a year ago I was trying to make a decision about whether or not I should pursue an opportunity. There were many good things about it, but there was one major drawback – it would mean that I would have less time to spend with my kids. As I pondered the decision, the reminder of how quickly time flies was at the forefront of my mind.
Would my children look back and regret that there were moments I didn’t get to share with them? Would I look back and have the same wishful thinking?
Would my children still get adequate instruction in the way that “Team Winter” thinks and behaves? What new influences would I be opening up to them?
What milestones would I miss? What memories would I forego?
In sum – Would they be o.k?
As I wrestled with the decision – something became perfectly clear.
I was focused on the impact on my kids – what I needed to consider was the impact on my walk with Christ.
This wasn’t to say that my kids weren’t a consideration. Since God has given me the privilege of being a mother and called me to that ministry, part of being a good steward of what He has entrusted to me is thinking through what would be best for them. But what I failed to remember in those initial moments is that God wasn’t going to call me to something that would be detrimental to them. Therefore putting my children at the forefront of my thinking wasn’t wise. God needed to come first and I needed to trust that as much as I love my kids – He loves them more. And He is not going to direct me down a path that would be harmful to them.
This is a difficult lesson to learn. Perhaps the challenge is especially steep for moms because God has created us to be nurturers in our families and we consider it our job to make sure “everyone is o.k.” It is also difficult because there may be some decisions where two godly people could come to different conclusions. In areas where there is not a clear issue of holiness and sin, God doesn’t call everyone to the same thing. But He does call all people to follow Him. And as His followers seek Him and follow His directions, we can have confidence that what He has planned is for His glory and our good.
And when it comes to being a parent, what He will use for our good will be for the good of our kids as well.